Who is God? All hail the power... (part 21)

Yet there are times when I wrestle with God, telling Him that His decisions are not the best, and that His judgments are not what I want. Do I win? Certainly not. Did Jacob in Genesis 32:9-33:17? Not really. He went toe-to-toe with an angel of God, probably God Himself in actuality, and may have won the match but lost the use of his hip in the offing. In return, God blessed him, God gave him the blessing of a family that would reach into Christ’s time and in fact lead to the focal point in Christ, and it all came about because of this wrestling match. He taught Jacob and me a valuable lesson. Neither of us are infallible, nor are we without spot. But it is Christ that makes us white, and pure, and holy. What amazes me still is that God blesses me continuously.  And all that does is show me how much I need Him in my life. I need Him. My hip is wounded. He helps me to walk. I am sinking. He holds me up. I need Him. Just as He taught Jacob to depend on Him, for everything from increasing the size of his herd to reconciling with his brother, God teaches me to depend on Him. I am so convinced that He has put me in the hospital so that I would learn to depend on my brothers and sisters in Christ.  I am convinced that He is trying to break me of this tendency to prove myself, to hurt others and myself, and it isn’t until I dig deep and plead with God. While what I do may be construed by many as correct, I am just prideful enough to suggest to God that because of this I am deserving of much more that what I have. And I don’t need to reconcile with others. I soon learn how alone I feel, even though God doesn’t leave me, I myself am guilty about the way I look down on people. And in asking His forgiveness and acknowledging Him then I become a recipient of His blessings – unworthy yet made worthy by the blood of Christ.  Does this mean that I can continue in my attitude? Paul says certainly not (Romans 6)! Because I am made new in Christ my walk should be humble, meek and lowly realizing that without God I am nothing. And without those to help me along the way, I will never excel along the heavenly way. Exodus 17:8-14, the love of friends kept Moses strong, because of people that God put in His life. And that is our purpose, to serve and love one another.